We’ve already talked about (almost) all the shallow side of the matter. Today it’s up to the slightly more serious one.
Why have a style? What’s it, what’s it for? Do you start from scratch? What if I don’t want one?
Ok, one of the first things you learn studying for a communication psycology exam is that it’s impossible not to communicate: even when you want to be alone, stay on your own nor want to utter a single word… well, you’re communicating precisely that.
And this points to?
It means that even though you don’t think you have a style, you do.
You have to decide if you like it or not, if it mirrors you, if you feel fine in it.
Nowadays we’re burdened under way too many imputs: there are countless tv shows where people are totally remade (may it be their haircut, plastic surgery, their skills or their homes). What we like in those shows is the chance that there will be for us too a touch of the same magic wand, so that we can born to a new life.
But they all mirror an impossible ideal of perfection (watch them with a critical mind: you’ll realise how scripted they all are) and most of all with the continued repetition they make us buy in the fact that if we don’t strut around all the time in super high heels (or we don’t have a perfectly shaved face 24/7), or with always perfect hair… we’re worth nothing.
Throw all this rubbish into the trash, and think about it: if you’re reading guides like this one it means you’re a little interested in the topic. Good! It’s healthy to take care of yourselves, it shows some love towards yourselves. But, why are you reading?
Probably because there is something about you’re appearance that you don’t fancy anymore.
Though you do have your own style already: why did you choose it? How comes you don’t like it anymore but you can’t get rid of it? ‘Cause it’s comfy, it’s an habit, you’re scared to try anything new? Because tv convinced you that it’s not good anymore?
Any how, start from there: if you really can’t stand shirts, you have no reason at all to hang one in your wardrobe, even thoug 99% of “style guides” tell you that you can’t live without such a “basic needful piece”. If that given type of trousers makes you feel so comfortable and you wouldn’t change it for anything in the world, don’t change it! Because I firmly believe that if you don’t feel at ease in some garments, even though they’re said to make you look better, you won’t look just as good, therefore it’s useless. (1)
No one starts from zero, no one is style-less, even if you don’t want one. After all having a style is a way to keep control over things YOU want to say.
Of course a jacket is not enough, nor it should be enough, to tell everything about you… let’s say it’s an introduction, the rest is up to your brains! (2)
We do live in a world widely based on sight, where the first impression matters, and where books are judged by their covers… so I think it’s better to take this by the horns and lead the game.
It’s just about sharing something of yourselves, remember that my semiserious guide is to look for your own style, not for what to wear at your Nth cousin’s christening, or your job interview at the bank, what do you want to say to people? What are you already saying that you want to keep, or to change?
The picture I chose for this post is not without thinking: it’s a set I’ve made, mixing -absolutely random- different types of jeans and tshirts. Bluejeans and white tshirts, you can’t get more basic than this, can you? But there are so many different cuts and shapes that it’s immediately clear that you can be loyal to your beloved jeans+tee combo, while changing things and having your style.
See? There is absolutely no need to turn into “fashionistas”, just forget about all that media pressure!
So, homeworks for next time: clear your mind about the reason why you want to have your own style, why you want to change, what you would keep and what you would toss.
(1)
Just don’t be lazy: change can be scary, you’ll may need some time to get used to new stuff. So please make small daily efforts (changing everything in a bulk may be funny, but won’t last), and if after a while you really don’t see yourself in something, just keep trying 😉 It has to be fun, you have to enjoy the process, but you also need some commitment!
(2)
This is both metaphorical and litteral: don’t give yourself away all, immediately, save something for some conversation, don’t show everything at the first sight. Please. Create some interest 😉
Why have a style? What’s it, what’s it for? Do you start from scratch? What if I don’t want one?
Ok, one of the first things you learn studying for a communication psycology exam is that it’s impossible not to communicate: even when you want to be alone, stay on your own nor want to utter a single word… well, you’re communicating precisely that.
And this points to?
It means that even though you don’t think you have a style, you do.
You have to decide if you like it or not, if it mirrors you, if you feel fine in it.
Nowadays we’re burdened under way too many imputs: there are countless tv shows where people are totally remade (may it be their haircut, plastic surgery, their skills or their homes). What we like in those shows is the chance that there will be for us too a touch of the same magic wand, so that we can born to a new life.
But they all mirror an impossible ideal of perfection (watch them with a critical mind: you’ll realise how scripted they all are) and most of all with the continued repetition they make us buy in the fact that if we don’t strut around all the time in super high heels (or we don’t have a perfectly shaved face 24/7), or with always perfect hair… we’re worth nothing.
Throw all this rubbish into the trash, and think about it: if you’re reading guides like this one it means you’re a little interested in the topic. Good! It’s healthy to take care of yourselves, it shows some love towards yourselves. But, why are you reading?
Probably because there is something about you’re appearance that you don’t fancy anymore.
Though you do have your own style already: why did you choose it? How comes you don’t like it anymore but you can’t get rid of it? ‘Cause it’s comfy, it’s an habit, you’re scared to try anything new? Because tv convinced you that it’s not good anymore?
Any how, start from there: if you really can’t stand shirts, you have no reason at all to hang one in your wardrobe, even thoug 99% of “style guides” tell you that you can’t live without such a “basic needful piece”. If that given type of trousers makes you feel so comfortable and you wouldn’t change it for anything in the world, don’t change it! Because I firmly believe that if you don’t feel at ease in some garments, even though they’re said to make you look better, you won’t look just as good, therefore it’s useless. (1)
No one starts from zero, no one is style-less, even if you don’t want one. After all having a style is a way to keep control over things YOU want to say.
Of course a jacket is not enough, nor it should be enough, to tell everything about you… let’s say it’s an introduction, the rest is up to your brains! (2)
We do live in a world widely based on sight, where the first impression matters, and where books are judged by their covers… so I think it’s better to take this by the horns and lead the game.
It’s just about sharing something of yourselves, remember that my semiserious guide is to look for your own style, not for what to wear at your Nth cousin’s christening, or your job interview at the bank, what do you want to say to people? What are you already saying that you want to keep, or to change?
The picture I chose for this post is not without thinking: it’s a set I’ve made, mixing -absolutely random- different types of jeans and tshirts. Bluejeans and white tshirts, you can’t get more basic than this, can you? But there are so many different cuts and shapes that it’s immediately clear that you can be loyal to your beloved jeans+tee combo, while changing things and having your style.
See? There is absolutely no need to turn into “fashionistas”, just forget about all that media pressure!
So, homeworks for next time: clear your mind about the reason why you want to have your own style, why you want to change, what you would keep and what you would toss.
(1)
Just don’t be lazy: change can be scary, you’ll may need some time to get used to new stuff. So please make small daily efforts (changing everything in a bulk may be funny, but won’t last), and if after a while you really don’t see yourself in something, just keep trying 😉 It has to be fun, you have to enjoy the process, but you also need some commitment!
(2)
This is both metaphorical and litteral: don’t give yourself away all, immediately, save something for some conversation, don’t show everything at the first sight. Please. Create some interest 😉
